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I remember her beautiful smile, her gentle voice, her silk like hair and her stunning eyes. But one thing that is always engraved in my mind is her


death

I remember the way I felt and what kind of expression I was holding. I have seen her DIE and DIE and DIE all over again till the point I lost count. But this pain never did numb out, it stung and frustrated me more and I can not keep this in anymore. This cruel endless loop happen on the first Goodbye.

-------------
The first goodbye, It was a beautiful day in snowdin and my brother was still excited about meeting the human. Papyrus was going to confront them and capture them if he could. It was always his dream to be in the loyal guard, yet it is unfitting to him. 

"______ you don't have to go with him, he should be fine" I said _____ smiled at me. Oh how her smile melted me inside. 

"I'm still worried he might do something stupid but everything should be fine" ______ said packing a first aid kit, she winked and said just in case.

"Papyrus let's go" ______ yelled Papyrus ran down stairs carrying a box of bones.

"I WILL BE BACK HOME SOON" Papyrus said running out the door. She pat my head before she ran after Papyrus. I felt an eerie feeling as I watched her retreating form.

A little later Papyrus came home crying. He was cover in red blood, my mind went to worst possibility.

"What happen!" I asked confused 

"_-_____ she" Papyrus said he tried to take a deep breath. 

"Please help her, now" Papyrus said grabbing my hoodie. I stood up quickly and ran, I ran as fast as I can. As I was running I saw red specks on the white snow. The closer I got, the bigger the splotches, until I saw a figure laying in the icy cold snow. The usually white snow was a deep red colour now.

"______!" I yelled kneeling down. I held her in my arms, her body was freezing cold.

"Sans...." ______ said her voice was strained and weak. 

"Yes" I said getting teary.

"Please tell Papyrus it's not his fault" She paused.

"and.... never will be" ______ took a weak breath. 

"Also that I love him" ______ said tears welling in her eyes, she tried to smile but failed.

"Sans" she said her cold hand reaching up to my cheeks her hand trembling.

"Yea, ______" I said fully crying now. 

"I lov-" And then _____ went limp in my arms. I remember I cried there for hours, my mind full of regret and anger.

----------------------------
The second googbye no matter what I didn't let ______ leave the house, but at the time I didn't know Papyrus will be the one to die. My heart shattered....... did I have to chose between the people I love? In the end ______ feeling guilt and anger left the house to be with Undyne. She helped Undyne with catching Frisk and I did not get to see her for few days. No messages nor calls from her and she didn't even reply to my call or messages. But after a few days I got a letter from Undyne.

It read 

Dear Sans

        I am sorry to inform (name) (L/name) has died and I assure her death is not..... she saved me...... I am so sorry Sans I know what she meant to you. You lost Papyrus and now I took away....... I am so sorry Sans. I am so so sorry Sans. Please forgive me........ You know, (name) kept smiling even till the end. She said she felt guilty saying it's her fault Papyrus died, She said she loved you, well she never got to finish her sentence but I think that's what she wanted to say. Sans......... I am sorry.

Sincerely 
Undyne

Her writing shook at the end and there was tear stains on the letter. That day I just stayed home clutching the letter and cried. It was harder for me, on the last time line I at least had Papyrus but now I'm alone. Why is life unfair?

----------------------
The third goodbye, I let her go with Papyrus. I just can not lose Papyrus yet both Papyrus and ______ came home, my heart filled with joy. I hugged both of them.

"Whoa, Sans what with the hug" _____ asked laughing.

"SANS ARE YOU OKAY YOU ARE CRYING" Papyrus said getting worried. I shook my head and smiled.

"you're such a weirdo" ______ said hugging me back. But that moment of happiness did not last for long. The day of judgement of Frisk came. I went alone but I didn't notice ______ was following me. My battle with Frisk continued, they did not kill my brother but they killed Undyne and other monsters. So in the end I had to stop them.

"No!!!" _____ yelled pushing me over when Frisk was about to strike me. She took the blow for me.... Once again she started to bleed and the cycle started all over again. 

"______! not again" I said running up to her. She was smiling, I didn't understand why but she was smiling.

"I protected you, go.... you know what will happen if you stay. I can deal with this" ______ said standing up clutching her side. 

"No I will figh-"

"Forgive me Sans. the rule can not be br-" _____ pushed me, I couldn't hear anything but I was forced to watch ______ being stabbed over and over again until you couldn't tell what it was. I closed my eyes can't taking it anymore, when I came back to my senses I was at home on the couch.

"WHOA SANS!?" Papyrus yelled surprised. I started to laugh, I didn't get why she sent me away and why was I forced to see her die again and again. At that time I didn't understand but soon I will. but for now, once again I felt as if I was stabbed in the heart and there was one question in my mind, was there anything I could do for her to live? 

"OH I ALMOST FORGOT _______ LEFT YOU A NOTE. I AM SORRY I SPILLED SOME SPAGHETTI SAUCE ON THE NOTE" Papyrus said handing me a piece of paper, I slowly took the note. The paper read I lov- but the rest was smudged. I laughed and kept laughing.

"SANS, ARE YOU OKAY" Papyrus said worried 

"I think a piece of my heart is broke again" I said It felt suffocating....

---------------------------
The fourth goodbye everyone lived. I felt a relief, no one died and Frisk refused to kill anyone. But......... BUT SHE DIED AGAIN. She wasn't killed in Frisk's hands but it was that bastrd flower. _______ was the only one that didn't survive. Frisk tried and tried but no matter what it could not be done. Why..... why!!!!

"Sans goodbye" ______ said smiling. I remember all her smiling face to the smallest of details but this time it was a little different.

"I'm sorry, but it's fa-" and again she died and again and again and this wicked cycle continued

-------------------

So I'm sorry, after multiple deaths I can't take it anymore. Remember you never got to finish your sentences but now I know. We were just destined not to have our happily ever after. It's was me or you.... I wish I could ask you how you felt. Maybe you went through what I did, facing my deaths repeatedly......... but I thought it was better if I died myself. I'm sorry ______.  So goodbye, I love you and I know you love me and that's santastic. Sorry, I didn't to make any joke in this letter.

"You idiot, if you're going to write an emotional letter. Don't put a terrible joke at the end" You said laughing quietly and clutching the letter.

"You weren't supposed to know........" you said your voice cracking

"I'm the one who's supposed to-"

"I'm sorry Sans"

RESET
*click*
I just love writing these fanfics. Th Th060 

My friend says I might have a problem. onion head 'sigh' 
 

But it's really motivating me to write which I'm happy about.La la la 
 Anyways I hope you enjoyed Ule 
(art does not belong to me, so credits to the awesome artists)
Add a Comment:
 
:icondashsansy:
Dashsansy Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2017  New Deviant
but it be so sadd Pikachu Crying Plz Cry run You Broke Foxy's Heart (Chat Icon) Cry forever Cry forever Cry forever Cry forever Cry forever Cry forever Cry forever Cry forever Cry forever Cry forever Chisaki Crying Icon Chisaki Crying Icon Chisaki Crying Icon Chisaki Crying Icon Chisaki Crying Icon Chisaki Crying Icon Chisaki Crying Icon Chisaki Crying Icon Chisaki Crying Icon Chisaki Crying Icon Chisaki Crying Icon Chisaki Crying Icon 
Reply
:icondashsansy:
Dashsansy Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2017  New Deviant
what does _____ mean?
Reply
:icondreemurrdraws:
DreemurrDraws Featured By Owner Mar 16, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
You insert your name
Reply
:iconmidnight-da-ruby-fox:
Midnight-da-Ruby-Fox Featured By Owner Feb 15, 2017  Hobbyist Filmographer
Chisaki Crying Icon Sayu Crying Icon Pikachu crying plz Pikachu crying Pikachu crying plz Rainbow Dash (cry) plz about to cry emote 
Reply
:iconundertalegirl87:
undertalegirl87 Featured By Owner Feb 6, 2017
SANS I LUV YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
Reply
:iconlivo9:
Livo9 Featured By Owner Jan 30, 2017
SO good but im crying.
Reply
:iconlivo9:
Livo9 Featured By Owner Jan 30, 2017
OOOOOHH the feels! I'm crting now
Reply
:iconnightblossom----sans:
NightBlossom----Sans Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
*starts holding back tears* eeeeeeeeeeeehgegggghhdhdidheksidhjdjdidhjdkdhebsgajhd whyyyyyyyyyyyyy why u make charachter die dheidjslidneejsjdisgjwjsjevwhwhwhwhereeeeeeeeeee *is sad now*
Reply
:iconflyhigh5323:
flyhigh5323 Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2017  Hobbyist Writer
Sorry!
Reply
:iconnightblossom----sans:
NightBlossom----Sans Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Merp it ok at least this didnt actually happen to us while we read it that whould be reaaaaaaaly bad XD
Reply
:iconspikeandjax:
SpikeAndJax Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2016  Hobbyist
CATARTIST DOES NOT SIMPLY DIE IN THE HANDS OF THAT BASS TURD FLOWER TRIGGERED PING TRIGGERED PING TRIGGERED PING Medic's Rage Intensifies (Chat Icon) 
Reply
:iconcrystaltheda:
CrystaltheDA Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2016  Student General Artist
Im not crying! Im not!
Reply
:iconrestingtigress:
restingtigress Featured By Owner Mar 10, 2017
oh really? Lenny Eyebrow Wiggle 
Reply
:iconkcshallenberger:
kcshallenberger Featured By Owner Nov 29, 2016   General Artist
This was REALLY good!
Reply
:icontherealmasonmac:
TheRealMasonMac Featured By Owner Nov 20, 2016
Honestly i'm not fans of these. To me, they are garbage  but hey, my opinion
Reply
:iconsashaartheart:
SashaArtheart Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I did not die 4 times.... I DIED 11 TIMES
Reply
:iconlittlemisssketch12:
LittleMissSketch12 Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2016
 Jontron Echmote - IM GOIN My heart....
Reply
:iconnightblossom----sans:
NightBlossom----Sans Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Same
Reply
:iconemmyanimephantom82:
EmmyAnimePhantom82 Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2016
Same! 😭
Reply
:iconlozgothgirl-twd:
LoZGothGirl-TWD Featured By Owner Nov 16, 2016  Hobbyist
the fuck...I'm crying, the FEELS
Reply
:iconblackwolfinsanity:
blackwolfinsanity Featured By Owner Nov 6, 2016
Oh my poor heart💔
Reply
:iconflutterdiamondprod:
FlutterDiamondProd Featured By Owner Nov 1, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
I should make a comic out of these fanfics :>
Reply
:iconsanstgeskeleton:
sanstgeskeleton Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2016
Made me cry. Please make another one
Reply
:iconnightblossom----sans:
NightBlossom----Sans Featured By Owner Jan 27, 2017  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Whyy XD 😭 its saaaad
Reply
:iconxxxcharadreemurrxxx:
xxxCharaDreemurrxxx Featured By Owner Oct 22, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
One of the BEST undertale fanfics out there
Reply
:iconglowneonflare:
GlowNeonFlare Featured By Owner Oct 19, 2016
Please tell me Sans is alive in the new reset!
Reply
:iconfriskxsansutrash:
friskxsansutrash Featured By Owner Oct 18, 2016  Professional General Artist
n
Reply
:iconcreeperdrawing:
Creeperdrawing Featured By Owner Oct 17, 2016  Student Digital Artist
swag
Reply
:iconkawiievee:
kawiievee Featured By Owner Oct 14, 2016
xD when reading this i made a name on the spot "nika partch field"
y that name came in my head idk xD dont ask
Reply
:icondandanfuntime12:
dandanfuntime12 Featured By Owner Oct 3, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
SO SAD Ghost Crying Emoticon Icon Gif - Undertale 1 Neko Emoji-14 (Cry) [V1] Cry run Inside Out Reaction Icon: Sadness Luffy Anime Emoji (Cry) [V4] Rainbow Dash (cry) plz Free FNAF2 Creepy Crying Child Icon Pikachu crying plz Five Nights at Freddy's - Crying Child Free Crying Child Icon Adventure Crying Child - FNAF World - Icon GIF rainbow cry Crying Mako  but I still love :3 thump up Thumps up Britney Spears Thumbs Up Britney Spears - Nice 
Reply
:icontakaracoyle:
Takaracoyle Featured By Owner Edited Sep 24, 2016
This is so terribly sad. Is she supposed to know that no matter what she has to die? Like it is a key event in time that cannot be changed, only delayed?
It was really well written though.
Reply
:iconspikeandjax:
SpikeAndJax Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2016  Hobbyist
My fursona is forced to do this
Reply
:iconsting-eucliffe-001:
sting-eucliffe-001 Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2016
GO AWAY ONION NINJA Ghost Crying Emoticon Icon Gif - Undertale Pikachu crying plz Pikachu crying plz Pikachu crying plz Inside Out Reaction Icon: Sadness Inside Out Reaction Icon: Sadness Inside Out Reaction Icon: Sadness Romano (Cries) [V4] 
Reply
:icondeadstarrose:
DeadstarRose Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2016  Hobbyist
IM NOT CRYING, I DONT CRY
Reply
:iconlanamaeh2005:
LanamaeH2005 Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
AWESOME..I have a problem of reading all of these fanfics XD KEEP DETERMINED AND WRITE WHAT YOU LOVE TO!
Reply
:iconkawiievee:
kawiievee Featured By Owner Oct 14, 2016
same
Reply
:iconflyhigh5323:
flyhigh5323 Featured By Owner Aug 25, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you
Reply
:iconlanamaeh2005:
LanamaeH2005 Featured By Owner Aug 25, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
np
Reply
:iconnapstaxx:
Napstaxx Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Sorry but I got confused at the end XD Great story ;-;
Reply
:iconlanamaeh2005:
LanamaeH2005 Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
me too
Reply
:iconticcitorii34:
TicciTorii34 Featured By Owner Aug 12, 2016
Its okay... So did I.
Reply
:iconflyhigh5323:
flyhigh5323 Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
thank you
Reply
:iconnapstaxx:
Napstaxx Featured By Owner Aug 10, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
What happened at the end?
Reply
:iconflyhigh5323:
flyhigh5323 Featured By Owner Aug 11, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
who knows
Reply
:iconanime-lover310:
anime-lover310 Featured By Owner Jul 29, 2016
feeeeellllssssssss *le cryface* Llama Emoji-08 (Crying) [V1] 
Reply
:iconflyhigh5323:
flyhigh5323 Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
I'm sorry
Reply
:iconch956100:
ch956100 Featured By Owner Edited Jul 26, 2016  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
if you don't know the kid's name, it's Frisk... oh, you're talking about someone else... sorry
Reply
:icongarret6000:
Garret6000 Featured By Owner Jul 16, 2016  Student Artist
Reply
:iconcalmingsnow:
CalmingSnow Featured By Owner Jul 16, 2016
It's to late for me, My kokoro WILL NEVER BE THE SAME T^T
Reply
:iconflyhigh5323:
flyhigh5323 Featured By Owner Jul 17, 2016  Hobbyist Writer
Im sorry
Reply
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